Britany Simon Photography

One year ago today, I lost the most precious person in my life, my Mother. I can't begin to tell you what a struggle the past two years have been with my Mothers battle with gastric cancer, and of course her passing. Only someone who has gone through this battle themselves, or with a family member with cancer or illness knows what kind of life changing affect it has on you. I can't put into words how much I miss her each and every day, or how different my life feels without my best friend who knew me the best, mind, heart & soul. She was the most amazing person, and radiated with a love & kindness like no one else I have ever known. I wanted to share my Mom's eulogy that I wrote for her funeral, it was the single most important thing I have ever written... It is a tribute to her, & her life...

"When my mother was diagnosed with Gastric Cancer last December, she made a promise that when she received her miracle of healing, she would become a spokesperson for God and the Power of Prayer. Although she didn’t receive her healing here on Earth, I thought I would try to carry on her promise, and speak about her and her miracle of Life.

Most of you here had the pleasure of knowing my Mother, but for those of you who were not fortunate enough to meet her, she was one of the most wonderful people I have ever known. She had the most remarkable way of making everyone feel special and welcome. I cannot remember a day she didn’t smile, or laugh, or find a way to bring out the best in every situation. She always knew the right thing to say, and had the best advice for everything…

I remember as a child I would dread running errands with my Mom, because somehow she would strike up a conversation with everyone. Whether it be someone else just shopping in the store, or the cashier at the check out counter. I never would have guessed that I would grow to find that quality so endearing about her. She had a special way with people, complete strangers would strike up conversations with her and tell her the most intimate details about their lives. No matter the circumstances, she always took the time to listen, and reminded us how important it was to take a moment for other people.

This is just one of the countless reasons why my mom was so special. Throughout her battle the past 7 months, never once did I ever hear her question her faith, or ever give up on her inspiring positive spirit. Part of that strength came from the overwhelming support from all her wonderful friends and family.

In a conversation earlier this summer, my Mothers friend had told her, “Patti, you live life with more Grace, than anyone I have ever known“. I don‘t think another word described my mom more perfectly. It was true, she lived life with the most amazing sense of Grace, and as perfectly as one could through the eyes of the Lord.

I recently found out my parents had discussed their ‘bucket lists’ together, and the only item on my Mothers list was time. More time to spend with friends and family, time to see my brother and sister get married, time to meet her grandchildren one day, and time to grow old with my Father…. When my Mom was given the news that her fight with cancer was ending, she told my father that “she was ready to go, that she lived a very good life, and had been very lucky.” It is an inspiration that she lived her life in such a way that she had no regrets, nothing left incomplete.

Wednesday evening after she passed, we all gathered at my parents house, and on the coffee table was a book my mom was reading of daily inspirations. I opened it, and was comforted by the last page that was bookmarked. It read:

“When our dreams come true and our plans prove successful, we find it easy to thank God and to trust His divine providence. But in times of sorrow or hardship, we may find ourselves questioning God’s plans for our lives.
On occasion you will confront circumstances that trouble you to the very core of your soul. It’s during these difficult times that you must find the wisdom and courage to trust God despite your circumstances. Are you a woman who seeks God’s blessings for yourself and your family? Then trust Him. Trust Him with your relationships. Trust Him with your priorities. Follow His commandments and pray for His guidance-and prepare yourself for the abundance and peace that will most certainly be yours when you trust the Shepard.

“He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul.“

I found great peace knowing this was the last page she read. If you asked her, she would tell you that all of her dreams did come true. That she had more joy and happiness in her life than she ever thought she would. She spent 30 years and 2 days married to my Father in a marriage filled with the kind of love… respect…and devotion anyone would envy, and she was the mother of the 3 children she had always dreamed of having. And she would always remind us that we were the ‘greatest joys of her life‘.

My mom was also an amazing friend to many, some for over 50 years. Old or new, she kept all of her friendships near and dear to her heart. She was a woman of great Faith, and she found peace and trust in God, and his plan for her life.

Earlier this summer, my sister and I were having lunch with mom, and she explained to us that she still had every hope in receiving her healing from God, but that we should understand that sometimes people don’t receive their healing here on Earth. That sometimes the healing comes to us in Heaven. It was important for her to tell us that if anything were to happen, and she didn‘t receive her healing here, that we should never question our Faith or relationship with God. I remember quickly trying to change the subject, because something about what she said, gave me the distinct feeling that I may one day find myself questioning God and his plans. I know I have, and you may have found yourself wondering as well… left with many unanswered questions and the reasons for losing someone so dear to us. We don’t always have the answers, but I find comfort in what my Mother had said… and I have reminded myself that she trusted in Gods plan, and that it was important for all of us to trust in Him as well.

Her life was an example for all of us to follow. The greatest gift we can give to my Mother now is to live our lives to the fullest and more in the way she would have… Smile more, smile at anyone and everyone. Find the humor in everyday situations. Strike up a conversation with a complete stranger. Take the time to listen. Live with no regrets. Laugh at yourself. Make mistakes, and forgive yourself for them. Make time for friends and family, and hold them close to you. Let the people you love, know how much they mean to you. Remind them often. Take the time to appreciate the simple things in life. Love deeply. And keep your Faith.

My mother will continue to live on in spirit through all of her friends and family. I will carry a piece of her inside of me for the rest of my life. And I will continually strive to live my life in a way she would be proud of…just as I had promised her the day she passed away. There won’t come a day that I will not think of her, and wish she was here with me. But I will be forever thankful …and feel forever blessed …that the most amazing wife, mom, and friend that I have ever known, was my Mother."

~I love you with all my heart Mom, I live everyday with you a part of me, and look forward to the day we are together again in Heaven. "I carry your heart with me, I carry your heart in my heart... I love you all the days."